Overheard

I have literally spent at least three hours of this day reading Overheard websites. I was emailed a link to Overheard at College this morning, and I've been reading that, Overheard in New York, and Overheard Everywhere whenever I can. I can't believe I didn't know about this - it's SO my new Craig's List. My emailing pal knew I'd love it to, because, as she put it, "[my] favorite thing to do is eavesdrop." True story.

Here's some faves:

Man on subway: Does this train go to 125th Street?
Woman: No. It's going downtown.
Man on subway: Oh, shit. I gotta go to 125th Street and suck a dick to get some crack. 
--1 Train


Girl #1: What does he look like?
Girl #2: The same way he looked when he was Catherine. 
Mount Holyoke College
South Hadley, Massachusetts

Grandmother: I think the cat is pregnant with one kitten or something.
Five-year-old boy: Yeah, and the kitten is like, controlling her from the inside. 
Spokane, Washington


Prof: Know how you can tell? The testicles. Yeah, that’s right, I said it.
University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee
Milwaukee, Wisconsin

Girl #1: I was tying one of the boys’ shoes, and he started singing “I’m In Love With a Stripper.” It was so cute.
Girl #2: No, it wasn’t! He’s three years old, he doesn’t know what a stripper is!
Girl #3: Yeah he does, his mom probably…
Girl #1: Strips.
Girl #3: Yeah.
Girl #1: Actually, his mom’s in jail. But she probably strips there.
Polk Community College
Winter Haven, Florida

Mother with little girl: Excuse me. My daughter wants to know if you're a pirate.
Woman wearing bandana: No. I'm just a lesbian.
--Crema Restaurante, 17th & 6th 

Girl: I am dating two different guys with kids and no one will take me to see Harry Potter. Now that's fucked up. 
--Eatery, 9th Avenue


I've been laughing so hard all day I think I may have become incontinent.