Golden Globs

I totally meant to type "Golden Globes" in the title, but my chubby child fingers wrote "globs" instead, and you know, I think that works just fine.

Let's focus on fashion. This is really what award shows are about, right? I miss the old days when E! would show the red carpet coverage from the past five years on award show morning. I think they lost the rights to that when they lost Joan and Melissa. Rats! Anyway, you already know that I loved Drew Barrymore's cracked out hair and makeup - let's see what else was fabu:

I love, love, LOVED this dress. It's quirky enough to be Maggie Gyllenhaal-esque, but still chic and totally appropriate. This is a great example of how you can get away with stuff at the Golden Globes that you can't at the Oscars. Because of the booze.

Speaking of booze, how great was Ricky Gervais? And bringing his beer onstage to boot! Check out this shitty quality video below:


Sorry about that tangent, but it was important. Back to pretty dresses!

I won't lie to you. I do not enjoy Eva Longoria. I don't see her talent or appeal at all. Even so, she looked amazing last night. This may have been my favorite look of the night.

You know I love it when the kids are age-appropriate. How oddly upsetting that dressing like this is actually kind of rebellious, considering the looks preferred by Hayden's peers.

Elizabeth Bank's dress is sure to get slammed by some for "washing her out," but if you saw her presenting on the TV machine, you know her makeup combated the pastiness very well:

Now let's get to the hot (and not so hot) messes! Really, this is what we live for here at Bongo HQ.

Teen Witch's Sister's clothes never fit on Gossip Girl, why would they fit in real life?

This angle makes Eva Mendes's dress look worse than it really did, but I'm glad someone decided to teach her a lesson.

Obvious choice, as Renee's dress is going to be on the top of every worst-dressed list until the end of time. I can't even think of a snarky comment, it's THAT bad.

Mama T really likes January Jones. For some reason I can't bring myself to second that emotion. It's probably because she always looks terrible. Proof: I knew her from Go Fug Yourself before I recognized her on Mad Men. Never a good sign.

I actually liked Megan Fox's dress. Why she always insists on showcasing her drunkface is beyond me, but she does know how to work a red carpet. Basically, I wanted to take this opportunity to say this: Who the frak are you, Megan Fox?! Why are you famous?! I know you were in Holiday in the Sun, but COME ON.

That's all for now kids, I have to start counting down to the Oscars!